So.. occasionally I’m plagued by doubts of my ability to write believable dialogue, being that while I’m a nice, fairly affable person (or so I like to think), I can be.. socially defunct (which line of thought led to a funny exchange with my wife). And it’s led me to wonder: is there some book or course out there called “Gab for Dummies?” Not that fantasy dialogue should necessarily sound like teeny-boppers in the school lunch hall. Indeed I’ve thought that a tremendous problem of fantasy dialogue is that we at least think people in older times spoke more formally (and I often wonder what proof or realities evidence or strongly suggest this), and yet.. I just don’t totally buy that, so that I would guess that the best fantasy dialogue (and I’m not saying what I link there is best) would come accross as heightened speech yet still informal-ish.

Gaaaahhh.

I need to be able to write everything from the informal to the formal.

Someone answered my question by recommending How to Win Friends and Influence People. First off - this book is a living light bulb. More qualifiers - not that I ernestly apply it or have finished reading it - but I strongly recommend this book. And per the topic here - it says the way to be a conversationalist is to stop talking about yourself and show sincere interest in other people’s thoughts. They’ll talk your ears off and you’ll learn a score of really relevant stuff: what other people think.

That’s great - though not enough. Fiction has two-way exchanges, not one sided ones (or I suppose I think that’s an ideal).

Where can I find it - histories or journals of intimate (and not in the revoltingly intimate connotations) conflict resolution? And which fantasy authors do this best? Or where are very good media approximations (very cynical about media here)? Where? Where?