Open Hatch

I got a clip from HaleStorm entertainment of my scene. Here it is. But first, when I was converting it from .mp4 to .mov format, I got some weird warping effects on me when the process didn’t work because my quicktime pro was outdated. Here they are.

This inspires a character (brief audio clip). “Why don’t you take a look at me? Does it look to you like I don’t know the difference between an ogre and a human?”

Okay so here’s my clip. Do not watch this clip of me in Mobsters and Mormons. Go see the movie. DO NOT WATCH THIS CLIP OF ME IN MOBSTERS AND MORMONS. GO SEE THE MOVIE. DO NOT WATCH THIS CLIP OF ME IN MOBSTERS AND MORMONS!! GO SEE THE MOVIE!! HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU HAVE TO SEE A MORMON FILM TO APPEASE THE FILM GODS?! ALWAYS MORE THAN YOU HAVE, IT’S NEVER ENOUGH ‘TILL IT HURTS!! DON’T LIE TO ME LIKE I’M JUDGE JUDY, YOU KNOW YOU HAVEN’T SEEN IT ENOUGH!

My self-review: I think I acted my first and second lines well, and the third maybe a little iffy. But quirky in an interesting way. I know in a marketing sense it’s evil to proclaim any potential flaw in what I do when others are involved. However, this doesn’t trouble me, because I’m evil.

I was considering pitching these anti-drug abuse Public Service Announcement concepts for broadcast. I’m wondering how they’ll go over.

1. A celebrity who says “Satan loves drugs. Do you worship Satan?” Cut to title: THE MORE YOU KNOW..

2. A guy boiling an egg who says “This is your brain. But what do you care about your brain, you underdeveloped, uneducated thin-skulled pedigree inebriate? When was the last time you read a book? Have you ever read something you weren’t told to? That fantasy/sci-fi crap-twaddle doesn’t count. Now you’re giving me that ‘I-don’t-comprehend-you-and-I’d-rather-be-sniffing’ look. So go ahead, get jacked up on that garbage and ease our population stresses. Someone else will take over your telephone work.” - pours oil on the burner and the room goes up in flames. Cut to title: THE MORE YOU KNOW..

3. A hippie who says “Some drugs take you into a psychadelic fantasy zone where the colors and the walls love you and the laws of nature don’t seem to apply. HOW DOES THAT SOUND TO YOU?!” Cut to title: THE MORE YOU KNOW..

4. A sports celebrity who says “A lot of athletes make a lot of money using drugs and don’t get caught for years, or maybe never at all. IS IT WORTH IT? You make the call.” Cut to title: THE MORE YOU KNOW..

As I said last entry, I watched Sons of Provo recently. It is a mockumentary surrounding an LDS “boy band”.

Oh. My. Gosh. Though fictional boy band, yet real for the sales of an album accompanying the film - I am all over this for how brilliantly stupid the music is. Besides that, I was really amazed and moved that, per the credits, these actors wrote and recorded the fake boy-band music which is in the film! More than this - and let me first disclaim that I am easily moved - the final song, which it would seem Kirby Hayborne wrote, so perfectly addressed the whole arc of the story of coming out of lunacy and shame, and was performed on the stage of my old High School, and was so beautiful, it made me weep!
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Sons of Provo is pretty funny. Brilliant on the part of the actors I think, who also did the music in the film, and.. I’ll write about that later. But first..

This just on the radio I heard (Doug Wright, KSL): some unknown hoodlum in a DVD duplication center swapped a porn film into more than one copy of Sons of Provo and it made it to retail sales. All appearances and apparently even the printing on the DVD are that it is the Sons of Provo film, but when you put it in the player.. hoo boy it ain’t.

So I just recently watched this movie on DVD, and dangit, I got the wrong one! Who will find the golden DVD?

That joke aside, the very scandal will surely create free publicity for the film. But I would add seriously that I wouldn’t want anyone to watch what this prankster swapped into the wrong case and print screen.

I trust Kurt Hale’s (president of HaleStorm) witness that this is no marketing ploy and they were not behind this. It was some very foul prankster in a duplication center - who if he is LDS and hooked on porn may be doing this as a cry for help and hoping to be caught - no doubt if they track him down he’ll be fired. Um.. and humiliated. All DVDs in stores have apparently been recalled for examination, which makes big overhead and maybe losses for HaleStorm.

And free publicity. But again I do trust that HaleStorm wasn’t behind this. Over the long road, abuses strengthen victims - all that aside, and back to the original point - this is a funny movie and I’ll write about it next entry. I wish I had not missed it in theaters, that and The Work and the Story - which is also funny, very funny.

If only Mobsters and Mormons had some scandal associated with it..

The other day I was at Shopko to purchase a planner downgrade (sorry Dr. Covey, this 7 habits stuff is too much for me now - Day Timer is enough and anything else is too much) and a Hispanic woman and her possibly 5-year old son rounded a corner, exchanging rehearsing tones as they passed me:

Mother: “Bueno. ..So -”

Son: “So -”

Mother: “So -”

Son: “So -”

Mother: “What.”

Son: “So what.”