Open Hatch

I’ve created levels for a video game. It’s a cartoony space station simulation, on the Xbox 360. Here’s a list of reviews. My levels are a love story. The goal is to date any or all of four girls and marry one. These are excerpts of dialogue I wrote for the levels. Player responses are in brackets.

Ann, the Librarian
Would you like to hear part of a poem I started?
[Yes]
Brutish swagger, mop my heart,
Flooding sorrows ‘ere thou part . .

Great Museum! Look at those kids just sucking in the knowledge! I wish I sucked as much as they do!
[You do!]
Really? Oh, I’m so flattered!

Are you enjoying our romance?
[Yes]
Does it sometimes seem like there is only one possible response to anything I say?
[Yes] [No]
What about now?
[Yes]

Poppy, the Hippie
I realized I was a robot when my third boyfriend contracted tetanus. My parents tried to blame my braces, but I knew better.
[Okay]

Will you build me a Comedy Club? It would be only for me. But it would reach out to everyone. Except for the people I make fun of.
[Okay]

Want to hear a joke?
[Yes] [No]
Okay. How many robots does it take to change a light bulb?
[ 3? ] [I don’t know]
None! The enslaved humans do it for them! A ha ha HA HA HA WRAAAA HAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
[Heh. . .]

Figures. They didn’t program you right.
[Okay]

Blenda, the Cheerleader
So that you know, my favorite drink is deep fried oil.
[Okay. . .]

Did you know Poppy said I was a bad, bad human in her.. journal? .. Isn’t Poppy awful?
[No]
But I thought you hated everyone I do! I hate you! No, I don’t, because then if you hated everyone I do, you would hate yourself! I’m so confused. . .
[All Right]

Wanna be my boyfriend? I’m not jealous or judgemental like those other terrible girls.
[Yep] [Sorry, no]

Wraeth, the Goth Chick
It’s very nice that you liked Ann’s poem, but I had a thought. If her heart flooded, wouldn’t it be a river of blood?
[I guess so]

Here’s a poem you inspired:
Black Hole spins, devouring all
Matter binding to the fall
Inward screaming, mute I call
None can hear the crushing pall.
[Thanks?]

Want to go on a pretend date?
[Sure]
Wahoo! That was fun.
[It was?]

So, I searched for hippie quotes (for character dialogue inspiration - next post), and Jack Kerouac is cracking me up.

I didn’t know that Bertrand Russel was (apparently) part of, or an inspiration to, Hippie Land. Maybe this is just a mere incidental, i.e. the maker of that page happens to find him inspiring.

When you buy BYU football season tickets, you have to fill out the following questionnaire. Really.

Please answer all questions honestly and to your best knowledge. Falsification will disqualify you for season ticket purchase.

1. Are you, or have you ever been, or are you affiliated with, any Jaded Cynical Pessimist Fair Weather Fans? Y/N
2. Do you know the rules of football? For example, will you cheer when the opponent scores a touchdown, should this ever occur? Y/N
3. Do you know what a touchdown is? Explain. _____________________________________________________
4. Does God answer prayers for BYU to win? Y/N
5. Have you been praying regularly for BYU to win? Y/N

..But not really.

Mobsters and Mormons is out in theaters - here is a theater listing.

I am credited in the movie by my full name, Richard Alexander Hall.

I expect to have a clip of my scene fairly soon. Meanwhile, praises and criticisms of the film are collected on this page, and clips of it also. There are a few other entries on it in this Mobsters and Mormons category.

The Cast

I think all the leads did great work, particularly the ones portraying parents (which now strikes me) - Marc DeCarlo, Jeanette Puhich, Scott Christopher, and Britani Bateman. IMDB has a cast listing. Marc DeCarlo is praised in most of the reviews as really carrying the piece, and I agree.

Praise

It won best Actor, Actress, Screenplay and Director against three other narrative films in the 2005 SpudFest.

Writes John Moyer of the response at SpudFest:

.. perhaps most exciting is the overwhelming response from those people who are not Mormon who live far outside the proverbial Utah-Idaho Jell-O Belt. It was great to have these people come up to me and provide such a wonderful response and wanting to know if it would come to their local theaters in various parts of the country and when they could get the DVD.

Here are a slew of overall positive reviews - especially the first I think - all-encompassingly (Probably the first formal review in any media, too), Ogden Standard Examiner (gives away many of the gags), The Salt Lake Tribune, BoxOffice, Meridian Magazine, The Movie Show on KSL (Real Audio File - Doug Wright: “Laughing my butt off.”

I have heard both a theater-goer and theater owner at different times describe it as “cute”. That bodes well with the women - both these people were.

Pseudonymous Flog’s entry on it backfired beautifully! - in the comments.

Criticism
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The film releasing today in which I have my first lines, it’s time I followed up on my promise to write about what persuaded me to act. Following is an abridgement of previously unpublished writing about it.

In June 2003, I was reading a test preparation book which described methods to calm over-anxiety and free up energy to perform well. It suggested vividly recalling moments of past successes, times I did something really well. Doing this for an exam connects feelings of past success to the present, producing a calm confidence. This book asked me to list memories of when I did really well with something and felt really satisfied. Reflecting for a while I came up with many things I did just well enough, but not well, nothing I was satisfied with - until one memory came: haunting and thrilling at the same time.
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I went to the premiere last night with me mum. She cried. Oh, the currency of a mother’s tears! I was more moved watching it this second time - less distrated by focusing on audience reactions and more seeing what the actors actually did. These lead actors are all very good.

I knew the gags already, but was I suppose giggling through many of them anyway, and guffawing at the more outrageous ones.

It was nice to see the leads of the film again and congratulate them on a great job - great job to the writer/director also.